Isabella’s Ice Cream is a business started by Dominic and Kristel in the Tucson area and people are drawn to their trucks and love their natural ice cream. They do a lot of events and are working on getting a permanent spot set up midtown (in front of Bookman’s I believe). Our wedding was not their first.  They did another one in town and actually drove one of their trucks into the ballroom of the resort.  What is so cool about having Isabella’s bring ice cream to an event like a wedding is that they can personalize the flavors as well as customize the cups.  The flavors they had on hand for us were:

• Reverend Colin’s Cookie Dough (my brother Colin officiated our wedding)
• Cotter Clan Chocolate Chip Committed
• Coffee Monogamous Mint
• No Pre-nup Pecan
• Legally Bound Berry Sorbet
• Spousal Cinnamon
• Cohabitation Cocunut

Thanks for such a cool wedding gift Dom and Kristel!!!

You see Ashley holds a little bit of a grudge because I didn’t make a Facebook proposal sooner than I did. When we got married my book had already been submitted. The book process take a while.  From the time I turned it in to the time it was released about 8 months passed. During that time we got married. The end of my book tied in with the fact that I had remarried so not wanting to give away the ending I didn’t propose to her on Facebook. Obviously a lot of our friends and all our family new we were married but not our entire Facebook networks.  When the book came out I didn’t even attempt to marry her on Facebook because she told me I would be wasting my time.  I hope I didn’t blow it.  What if I have to spend the rest of my life not married to her on Facebook?  I don’t like thinking about that.

I don’t believe it is too late. Ashley – we can do this. Marry me on Facebook and make me the happiest man online. How will I deliver this message? Well I already did the Facebook portion of it. Now I think I will copy a link to this post into an email and send it to her . . . wish me luck.

script type=”text/javascript”>// // ]]> http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/2012/03/ashley-will-you-marry-me-on-facebook/feed/ 3 http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/2012/03/tucson-festival-of-books/ http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/2012/03/tucson-festival-of-books/#comments Fri, 09 Mar 2012 03:18:36 +0000 Kevin http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/?p=2095 ]]> http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/2012/03/tucson-festival-of-books/feed/ 1 http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/2012/02/my-retirement-community/ http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/2012/02/my-retirement-community/#comments Thu, 09 Feb 2012 03:43:45 +0000 Kevin http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/?p=2088 I received this e-mail this week from my neighborhood association.  It is just too good to keep to myself.  I essentially live in a retirement community in the Tucson suburbs.  90% of the homes in my neighborhood are owned by retirees with small fancy dogs.  Watch out for the guy walking my neighborhood with his hunting knife.

“Hello All,
Attached is the April Newsletter.
 
Also a concerned owner asked that I forward this email to all of you.
 
 
I want to report an incident that happened to me on Sunday, 2-05-12, around noon.  I was walking my little dog on in our subdivision.  As I walked eastbound on the South side of the street, I noticed two medium sized dogs running north across the street from the south side into an open gate of a fence.  I don’t know who the home belongs to.  As I continued to walk on the sidewalk on the south side of the street, I saw the two same dogs running from the same gate straight toward me at a high rate of speed.  I quickly picked up my little dog that was on a leash to prevent the dogs from attacking her.  I heard a lady from the home yell at the dogs from the inside the gate.  I tried to kick one of the dogs behind me but missed.  My dog dropped to the sidewalk and lost its leash.  The two dogs ran as I tried to kick them but my little dog was about to run after them.  I quickly reached down into the sidewalk and grabbed my dog before it ran off.  I badly scrapped my right knee when I hit the sidewalk.  The two dogs ran back inside the gate where the lady was standing.  She asked me if I was alright.  I responded to her that she’d better keep those dogs inside her yard with the gate shut.  She closed the gate.  I also yelled at her from across the street that I don’t want to hurt her dogs but I will next time.  Then she went into her house.
 
I could have killed those dogs running at me; I could have sued the lady for my injury; I could have called the police and animal control but I didn’t.  I treated my large knee scrape at home.
 
About a month ago, I was driving in the neighborhood and I saw a medium sized dog walking very slowly.  I stopped my vehicle to see if the dog was injured.  I noticed the dog had a tag around its neck.  The dog wasn’t hostile.  After trying to examine the name and address on the collar, the dog got up and ran off into a side street.
 
Please warn residents that some of their dogs are on the loose in the streets and they may attack other small dogs or people.  These loose dogs might also get attacked by javelinas, bobcats, mountain lions, coyotes, or snakes.  From now on I will be carrying a big fat stick and a hunting knife to defend my pet and ward off any attacks.  I suggest Cadden Management write an article in their newsletters warning residents to keep their dogs leashed or inside their property lest they open themselves up for a big lawsuit.  I don’t want to get treated for possible rabies.  I advise Cadden management to levy heavy fines to residents who don’t have the common sense to keep their dogs from running around in the neighborhood.  I also advise Cadden Management to avoid any lawsuits themselves for their failure to regulate loose dogs from endangering pets and people at Monument Vista.”

There you have it.  Exciting news from my hood.

It isn’t easy to get married in Mexico we quickly discovered.  $800 to apply, blood tests that must be taken at a Mexican lab, and a minimum of 7 days spent in the country prior to the ceremony.  My guess is that there is probably a way around that for the rich and famous, but we didn’t have the time to pull it off.  We would need another plan.  We didn’t short ourselves the Mexico vacation, however, and figured taking our honeymoon prior to getting married was brilliant idea.

Then I believe that on June 9th of last year (a month or so after the honeymoon) Ashley and I decided a wedding didn’t have to be that complicated.  We could do it at home, we could plan it ourselves, and it wouldn’t cost a fortune.  9 days later we were married in our backyard with around 60 friends and family members.  It was perfect except that one of my sisters couldn’t come and bring her family on short notice.  We missed them.  The Reverend Colin T. Cotter mastered the ceremony.  The ink on his Universal Life Church minister card hadn’t dried yet.

I learned some interesting things about Arizona marriage law in those 9 days leading up to our wedding.  Did you know you can marry your first cousin in Arizona?  True story – but you have to be 65 years or older.  I think had I known that sooner I still would have chosen Ashley over holding out for a first cousin 27 years down the road.  Also the laws on who can officiate a wedding in Arizona are a bit foggy.  We had heard of people having friends or relatives officiate weddings but didn’t know how it all worked.  The law says the wedding official must be a licensed minister in some church.  Did that mean somebody could be ordained by the church of Dudeism and legally oversee a wedding?  We wanted to get married on our terms, but we also wanted to make sure it was legally binding.  Ashley sent an e-mail to the local office that would have the answer and they responded by phone.

We learned that in Arizona they don’t verify anything when they received the signed marriage license back in the mail.  As long as their are signatures on the lines for bride, groom, witness 1, witness 2, and wedding official then you are legally married once the document is filed.  You don’t need to have a wedding.  You don’t really need a licensed official.  Of course, we didn’t cheat the system.  For approximately $20 Colin did become a Universal Life minister.  Heck, he can even build a brick and mortar church if he wants.  I splurged and got him the wall certificate and wallet card.  Getting married in Tucson and looking for someone to oversee your wedding?  Colin is your man.  He is confident, well spoken, and showers most days.

I thought the funniest part about how we went about getting married was the actual visit downtown when we picked up our marriage license.  There would have to some red tape there right?  I mean how easy can it be to get the license?  WE DIDN’T HAVE TO SHOW I.D. to get our marriage license.  That’s right.  As soon as we left the office I turned to Ashley and said “Best practical joke ever – get two people married without them knowing.”  I mean how funny would that be if somebody went to get married and discovered they already were?  I actually did show my I.D. to the clerk who gave us our license, but only because I paid by credit card (yes – I’m old fashioned like that – marry me and we don’t go dutch – I picked up all $72).

So there you have it:  9 days of planning, one ordained brother, $72, a beautiful yet inexpensive wedding dress (Yes – she wore a dress!), some catered Greek food and we were married, and most importantly a life time to look forward to sharing with my bride . . . priceless.

The Wedding may be known as the “bride’s big day,” but the groom is getting married to right?  Be The Man:  The Man Registry Guide For Grooms – A practical (and funny) guide to navigating the wedding minefield leads grooms-to-be through the wedding planning process – from choosing an engagement ring through planning the honeymoon.

Co-founder of TheManRegistry.com and author Chris Easter says, “We already know that you’re ‘the man’ in your everyday life.  Now, It’s time to become ‘the married man,’ which includes stepping up and taking an active role in preparing for the most important day of your life.”

From the wedding budget to the bachelor party, from rehearsal to reception, Be The Man, will help grooms-to-be grow from an innocent bystander in the planning process to a connoisseur who finds a way to leave a personal mark on his wedding.  The book includes suggestions and tips for:

• Engagement ring shopping
• Wedding plan of attach and duties for dudes
• Wedding party and guest list
• Registering for gifts
• Bachelor Party
• Style and Attire
• Ceremony, reception and wedding night
• Honeymoon
• What to do with the dress after the wedding  – Just kidding . . . what happened to this chapter Chris?

But, the mayhem was fun.  I wouldn’t trade it for anything.  My sister Lisa and her family stayed with us for a week.  My brother-in-law Eric and his family spent the night on Christmas Eve.  Santa delivered presents to 7 children and Santa did not hold back – the mountain of corrugated to recycle was massive.

And my mother did manage to get Ashley’s name onto my stocking that she keeps at her house.  There was concern last year because the red thread from my ex-wife’s name had seemingly stained the stocking for good.  Last year my stocking had a bow over my ex’s name.  I didn’t ask my mom her secret, but she did managed to get it white again.  I bet she bleached it a little every night since last Christmas.  And just to be safe she made Ashley’s name a bit bolder than the rest.  I have the boldest stocking spouse in my family – take that siblings.

I’m sure mom plans on holding onto these stocking forever which makes me even more motivated to make my marriage work.  If, for some reason, Ashley kicks me to the curb someday my next Match.com profile will have to include:  “Man seeks woman who is named Ashley for companionship.”  I guess the good news is that the name Ashley didn’t become popular until the mid 80′s so any future Ashley responding to my ad in the event the current one dumps me would be considerably younger than me.

2011 was quite a year.  I look forward to 2012 and wish everybody the best.  Happy New Year!

Online dating is an interesting phenomenon.  Truth be told I used to look down on it – of course then I was married.  Heck when I dated the internet didn’t exist in a form like it does now.  But I used to think that people that needed the internet to find love must be flawed.  I was wrong.  After my divorce in 2009 I wanted to get back out there, but wasn’t in a position where I had all sorts of free time to dedicate to that cause.  I decided to give the internet a chance and after a short amount of time on a free internet site I decided that a small investment might be justified.  I figured $30 would guarantee no correspondence with people just screwing around and I bought 3 months of everything Match.com had to offer.

Every few nights I checked out the local ladies.  I sent a few messages and winked at some that caught my eye.  Yes – one can wink on Match.com.  Ashley says winking is lame and is probably right.  Her position is that a simple note is far cooler than a wink.  No effort is required for a wink.  You pick the person, click “wink”, and they are notified of your interest.  She says she paid no attention to winks she received.  Now that I think about it few women I winked at ever acknowledged my winks – and I think I winked at the majority of single Match.com women in the Tucson area.  Perhaps she is right – the wink is probably lame.  Anyhow . . . I was on Match.com winking away and went on a few Match.com dates that were busts.  After a few weeks I decided Match.com wasn’t for me.  However, I had prepaid for 3 months, so I still received the occasional message from women in pursuit of me.  Oh did I receive messages over those couple of months (at least 2 – including Ashley’s).

Ashley claims I was the only guy she hit on.  Her story is that she signed on the Match.com half-heartedly and turned down lots of guys in town.  According to her all of them were topless in their profile pictures.  Apparently my Tucson competition liked to show their chests.  I don’t doubt she had a lot of suitors.  She also claims I was the only guy she ever reached out to – not with a wink but a message.  I showed up in her daily 5 I believe.  When you sign on to Match.com they send you a message every day with 5 people they recommend for you.  Even though I was outside of Ashley’s specified age range (I was 36 at the time and her cutoff was 35 – lots of women make their upper cutoff 35 so if you are a guy 36 or 37 lie and say you are 35) she found me so irresistible that she sent me a note.  That’s a believable story the way I see it.

I’m telling this story like it all makes sense to me.  It doesn’t.  I got lucky.  I could not have predicted in a million years that I could meet a woman like Ashley on Match.com.  I reflect at times and have a hard time believing how this all played out.   After Ashley messaged me we corresponded for weeks before we met.  It’s crazy but I felt like I had a very good sense of who she was before that first date – a date that ended with a high five (I don’t waste any time).

Now we are married and are busy taking care of our perfectly blended family.  It didn’t start with a wink, and I can’t believe this is the case, but I have Match.com to thank for helping me find Ashley . . . or helping Ashley find me.  Technically she found me.

With the books I am giving away I am including bookmarks cut from my ex-wife’s wedding dress with this disclaimer:  Do not let your children put this bookmark in their mouths.  If you would also like a copy of my book and a wedding dress bookmark check out my Facebook page for contests of send me something creative that you did with a wedding dress.  If I like what you did I’ll send you a book.  Thanks!