Dec 15 2011

Ashley and I got married in June.  We met on  In my book I shared our story. caught wind of it and they contacted me.  Check out the t-shirts they sent us.  If you find love on you too can get t-shirts.

Online dating is an interesting phenomenon.  Truth be told I used to look down on it – of course then I was married.  Heck when I dated the internet didn’t exist in a form like it does now.  But I used to think that people that needed the internet to find love must be flawed.  I was wrong.  After my divorce in 2009 I wanted to get back out there, but wasn’t in a position where I had all sorts of free time to dedicate to that cause.  I decided to give the internet a chance and after a short amount of time on a free internet site I decided that a small investment might be justified.  I figured $30 would guarantee no correspondence with people just screwing around and I bought 3 months of everything had to offer.

Every few nights I checked out the local ladies.  I sent a few messages and winked at some that caught my eye.  Yes – one can wink on  Ashley says winking is lame and is probably right.  Her position is that a simple note is far cooler than a wink.  No effort is required for a wink.  You pick the person, click “wink”, and they are notified of your interest.  She says she paid no attention to winks she received.  Now that I think about it few women I winked at ever acknowledged my winks – and I think I winked at the majority of single women in the Tucson area.  Perhaps she is right – the wink is probably lame.  Anyhow . . . I was on winking away and went on a few dates that were busts.  After a few weeks I decided wasn’t for me.  However, I had prepaid for 3 months, so I still received the occasional message from women in pursuit of me.  Oh did I receive messages over those couple of months (at least 2 – including Ashley’s).

Ashley claims I was the only guy she hit on.  Her story is that she signed on the half-heartedly and turned down lots of guys in town.  According to her all of them were topless in their profile pictures.  Apparently my Tucson competition liked to show their chests.  I don’t doubt she had a lot of suitors.  She also claims I was the only guy she ever reached out to – not with a wink but a message.  I showed up in her daily 5 I believe.  When you sign on to they send you a message every day with 5 people they recommend for you.  Even though I was outside of Ashley’s specified age range (I was 36 at the time and her cutoff was 35 – lots of women make their upper cutoff 35 so if you are a guy 36 or 37 lie and say you are 35) she found me so irresistible that she sent me a note.  That’s a believable story the way I see it.

I’m telling this story like it all makes sense to me.  It doesn’t.  I got lucky.  I could not have predicted in a million years that I could meet a woman like Ashley on  I reflect at times and have a hard time believing how this all played out.   After Ashley messaged me we corresponded for weeks before we met.  It’s crazy but I felt like I had a very good sense of who she was before that first date – a date that ended with a high five (I don’t waste any time).

Now we are married and are busy taking care of our perfectly blended family.  It didn’t start with a wink, and I can’t believe this is the case, but I have to thank for helping me find Ashley . . . or helping Ashley find me.  Technically she found me.


    11 Responses
    • you are very lucky to find your true love, finding true love is the hardest mission to complete in this word.

    • Stephanie C | Seriou

      Totally awesome. So glad you found happiness. I wasn’t sure if the ex’s wedding dress would leave you forever jaded.

      I met the hubs on lavalife. It’s way cheesier and takes much less effort. He messaged me in the end, and the poor bastard married down.

      But we’re happy!
      Merry Christmas to you two!

    • I am so happy that you found each other! The dating scene is not what it used to be. You cannot find quality people in bars. Online is the obvious choice. I met my husband through the personal ads in NUVO, a local, free newspaper. He was not what I was looking for. But he was persistent. He hung in there for 4 1/2 years before I was willing to marry him. He is most certainly my best friend. We have now been married 12 years and I don’t think I have ever been happier! Good luck to the two of you and Merry Christmas!

    • I will wink at you now! 😉

    • I met my husband on match 9 years ago! Congratulations! Marriage is great the second time around.

    • What an awesome story! Loved your book 🙂 y’all are rockin’ those tees! Congrats again and thanks for the sweet note!!

      Cayla from

    • I adore this post. Reminds me a lot of something my boyfriend would say “she found me”. I did’nt believe in online dating but damn was I shock when I befriended this guy on myspace (yes, myspace) who then turned out to be my soulmate (he was there for.months for me, even after a bad breakup.with another guy. He always says that I was the one who found him.

      Anywho, I love your site! Been a fellow fan for a while 🙂

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